Easily Distracted by Tits
🇺🇸 Printed In & Shipped From USA
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Rated 5 stars by degenerates worldwide.
Yeah, here’s the shirt you tell your kids: “It’s about birds, I swear.”
It’s the kind of joke that sounds like you’re insulting everyone’s mom but you’re legally safe. The dumb pun of nature meets the degeneracy of the mind. Wear it, people laugh, people stammer, and someone will ask you if you meant the bird kind. That’s your moment.
👉 😂 Gets laughs from pun lovers, gag reflex from the easily offended.
👉 👕 Soft cotton — because even your pervy jokes deserve comfort.
👉 🐦 Perfect for bird watchers, beer nights, or destroying parental dinner talk.
👉 🖕 A subtle finger to the squeamish — “Yes, I meant that.”
It’s clever, it’s dirty, and it walks the line between innocence and “did he just say that out loud?”
Materials
🔥 Premium Tee, Built to Last
✔️ Super-soft — feels amazing, fits even better
🎯 High-quality prints with eco-friendly inks (no cracking or peeling)
💪 Pre-shrunk & durable — made to outlast your sarcasm
Wanna grab 2? It’s just $50 + FREE shipping 😎
Shipping & Returns
All shirts are made to order and ship in 2–5 business days.
U.S. delivery typically takes 3–7 days after fulfillment.
We offer a 30-day refund policy for misprints, damages, or wrong items — no hassle.
Dimensions
Size | Chest Width | Length | Fits Chest (US) |
---|---|---|---|
S | 18" | 28" | 34"–37" |
M | 20" | 29" | 38"–41" |
L | 22" | 30" | 42"–45" |
XL | 24" | 31" | 46"–49" |
2XL | 26" | 32" | 50"–53" |
3XL | 28" | 33" | 54"–57" |
Care Instructions
To keep your tee from becoming a crop top:
- Wash cold, inside out
- Tumble dry low or hang dry
- Don’t iron the print
- Avoid bleach unless you're into surprises


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⚡ Storewide Offer: BUY 1 TEE, GET 1 50% OFF - Promo code: B1G1